Sometimes a present exchange just doesn’t work out and makes everyone uncomfortable… Instead of WHAM!’s “Last Christmas” it’s Young Jeffrey’s “Last Grinch-mas”
Last Grinchmas, I bought you a Car,
But you shook you head No, said “Where’s the Big Bow?”
This Year, I promise you Dear
You ain’t getting nothing special
Wrapped presents, you tore ’em apart
But you the opened the case, and made a stink face,
You Wanted a Disneyland Trip
The Paris one, not Orlando! (no, no)
Next gift I, thought you’d cry
But you took off the Lid, and just rolled your eyes
I tied a ribbon, on a Little Puppy
You said: “This ain’t a Golden doodle, you dummy”
“You Ruined Christmas” that’s what my aunt told me,
And you won’t believe, which finger she Showed me!
Stomped her Foot, on the Painting I made her,
Thought It was Kinda harsh, I was just a First Grader
Last Christmas, I lit up your wrist,
It was not Princess Cut, so you threw a Fit,
This Time, the bling that I buy
Will be a Ring Pop, so suck it
Last Grinchmas, You got an air-fryer,
And you said it looks neat, but where’s the receipt?
I hear, you took it to Sears
Exchanged it for a new Model (Model)
What is this, Mom!?! I said I wanted Call of Duty: Black Ops (Platinum Edition)! Not Call of Duty: Black Ops (Gold Edition)!
“Um, ok, But isn’t it still the same game?”
Nooo! It’s Slightly Different!
Christmas Karen… Never Satisfy her,
She called up Santa’s super SUPERVISOR!
My gawd, you told me you wanted a Peloton,
Then cried, sayin’ “Oh this must mean, I’ve put some weight on!?”
A brand new iPhone, that ya made me send back…
Guess the ONE, that I got was in the Wrong Shade of Black!
You crossed off your Nana, and put your name first…
Acting like a Sausage, cuz you’re the Brat-Wurst
Bought Tickets, to see Harry Styles,
Til you pointed out they, weren’t quite center stage
That night, for triple the price…
You reposted on Ticketmaster…
Each Christmas, You hate All my Gifts,
That’s why your Caller ID, says: “Ungrateful B****”
This year, I’ll make it quite clear,
You ain’t Getting NOTHING Special (Special)